The child would have died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.
but before she did
the werewolf got down on her knees, I saw it with my own eyes peeking out the curtains
and she bit down on the throat of the child, bit it hard, even more blood spilled on the road.
when the werewolf vanished into the woods
She was in the form of a girl I recognized from the bar, think her name is Bonnie ... but the EMTs when they arrived heard the wolf howling in the woods and they told the newspaper it sounded just like crying.
The vampire upstairs did not find love in Dusseldorf. He comes down through my ceiling and he is weeping too.
"What happened with the mermaid Frankenstein?" I ask.
"Don't ask!"
"Ok. I've got lady problems too. My girlfriend started dating my friend Paul instead."
"Help me and I'll kill Paul."
"No we don't have to do that. What happened with your mermaid?"
"She sent me an electronic telegram on the World Wide Web and when I clicked on the telegram it asked for my name, address and social security number ..."
"Oh no, you didn't enter that, did you?"
"Yes! Yes I did! Now my bank account is empty and I find out that my love in Dusseldorf is not who she say she is!"
"It's probably a hacker in Lithuania."
"I will go there and find them and you will come with me."
"I can't," I said, "I have this cat."
I pointed to the cat.
The vampire pointed at the cat too and the cat exploded in a whoosh of fur and bones.
"To Lithuania," he said.
The little girl from the car wreck wakes up in the morgue.
She is covered in blood but she had no wounds.
She is seven years old and her clothes have not been cut off.
She would not have been cold anyway.
She left the morgue.
She went out across the wet lawn.
Into the big moonlight.
Many miles away she could hear howling coming from the trees.
It was her new mother.
The child began to sprint towards her cries.
That's how Bonnie got that kid I see her with, she'll pretend she's the kids aunt, that she adopted her because her parents are meth heads but i know the truth, I have gotten tanked with Bonnie and she has told me all about it.
One last thing
The boy with the alligator face enters a pie eating contest.
And he wins.
No one wants to sit anywhere near him.
So he is the only one eating pie.
And at the end, the judges pass him his blue ribbon, tied to a long pole so the boy doesn't bit their hands off.
There's a prize, too.
His prize is, a kiss from the prettiest girl in town.
My ex girlfriend, Shannon.
