Norman wears coat by Stamm & sunglasses by Marni.
Roman wears sneakers by Reebok, jeans by The Kooples, tie by Versace & jacket by Anni Salonen.

Art Direction & Styling by Stef Woods
Photography by Ryan Molnar
Words by Cameron Worsley
Producer by Austin Huq
Casting by Cameron Nedrick
Hair by Noriko Takayama
Make up by Anri Omori and Erika Leadbeater

What is love?

How do we know when we're in it - or out of it?
Can we even be sure we've found it in the first place?

During Autumn 2024, I sat down with five Berlin-based couples, each living their own unique love story, to explore what love means to them. I wanted to hear about their experiences with love and how they articulate this complex emotion.

Although I began without predetermined themes, common threads quickly emerged as I completed each interview. These included healing from toxic relationships, grappling with codependency, and navigating open relationship dynamics. Despite these challenges, I was struck by their self-awareness and commitment to building healthier, more authentic relationships.

Roman & Norman

As we’re sat in the back garden of their home in Brieselang, 1 hour outside of Berlin, Roman begins to recite a love note that he sent to his partner, Norman, just after they first met.

Dear Norman, across all the ages, all the journeys and time, I whisper in your ear, it is great to meet you again, and I look forward to all the adventures ahead of us. I love you. Roman - 7th November 2004.

Their love story began nearly two decades ago with a chance encounter in Berlin. Norman, working as a Spiritual Guide and Healer, had a last-minute opening due to a cancellation. Roman, a new client, filled that slot. When their eyes first met, they both experienced what they describe as a "loud silence," accompanied by an "intense flow of intimacy." This moment sparked a brief but passionate love affair in Berlin, which ended when Norman returned to his home in Sydney.

What followed was a slow-burning connection, built over years of meetings in cities like Berlin, San Francisco, and L.A. Both were cautious at first - Norman had just ended a 26-year relationship and was hesitant about dating an actor, while Roman was unsure about commitment. Their bond deepened with each encounter, eventually leading to Norman booking a one-way ticket to Berlin.

20 years later, their love continues to grow stronger, rooted in open communication - even when it’s hard - and a commitment to preserving their individual identities.

You must be you. He must be He. I must be me.
Expect nothing from that personality. That's who they are. - Norman

Norman and Roman’s enduring love story can be defined by a profound respect for one another and a commitment to staying calm, even in challenging moments. Throughout their two decades together, they’ve embraced a philosophy of stepping back from confrontation and revisiting sensitive topics when they’re both ready - often over a cup of tea. For them, every challenge is an opportunity for growth, rather than a battle to be won.

As Norman put it:

Life's too short. The older you get, the shorter it gets. I've maybe, if I'm lucky, got 10-15 years to get to 95, maybe 100. I don't know, and it would be a blessing to live to that. But you know, time runs out, so why spend a moment fighting about something that's so insignificant? Come - on.

Jota & Dianna

Jota wears shirt by Moschino, trousers by Javier Guijarro & boots by Vivienne Westwood.
Dianna wears top & skirt by Javier Guijarro & bracelet by Uncommon Matters.

I didn’t use Grindr often because of the challenges of being a trans woman and dealing with cisgender men who didn’t know how to relate to trans bodies. But one day, I saw Jota’s profile - and I was enchanted. - Dianna

After breaking the ice, Dianna recalls the sheer joy she felt upon discovering that Jota was Brazilian - meaning she could speak in her own language. What followed was a marathon video call that lasted eight hours, leaving Dianna with an undeniable feeling:

When the call ended, that’s when I truly realised I was in love.

At the time, Dianna was living in Norway and Jota in Germany, but they embraced the distance, using it as an opportunity to explore each other’s worlds through conversation. It wasn’t until three months later that they would meet in person for the first time.

When we first met in Berlin, in between conversations and affection, we realised that we were no longer in a casual relationship, and that we were already walking a path together. - Dianna

A pivotal trip to Brazil would bring their relationship to even greater depths. Sharing five transformative months there, they closed the distance that had defined their connection, no longer speaking through a phone, but enjoying the closeness and intimacy of being together in daily life.

Now, as they celebrate one year together, Dianna and Jota reflect fondly of their journey of love, connection, and growth.

Growing together as a Brazilian trans black couple living in Berlin brings challenges and opportunities for connection, understanding and mutual support. We created our own safe space, and at the same time we honour our individual identity by respecting our own journey. - Jota

Lara & Valeria

Lara wears suit by David Koma, stockings by Falke & sneakers by Our Legacy.
Valeria wears top by Caterina Giovanelli, skirt by Anni Salonen & shoes by Our Legacy.

I feel like love is like a building, you know. So the first level would be like, lust. Like, you wanna make out with the person. And then infatuation, and then it starts building and building. I would not say infatuation is not love, but you need to nurture it. You still need to go further up the ladder. And the further up you go, the bigger this feeling of safety gets, you know. - Lara

Lara and Valeria first met at a karaoke bar, where they bonded while giving advice to a mutual friend stuck in a toxic relationship, not knowing this would mark the start of a much deeper connection. They met again weeks later at KitKat, where they found themselves talking for hours in the smoking area. The conversation drifted from life and love to Valeria’s open marriage, which she had been navigating for the past year.

There was just this instant chemistry, this warmth between us. It felt different from anything I'd experienced before. - Valeria

As their relationship deepened over the following months, Valeria faced the truth about her marriage. “I was codependent on him, and he was codependent on me” she admitted. “We would have gradually destroyed each other.” Lara, seeing the emotional toll and protecting herself, gave Valeria an ultimatum - this led to a brief separation, during which both reflected on what they truly wanted.

While on a soul-searching trip to Portugal, Valeria gained clarity through conversations with elderly strangers who offered her some sage wisdom. After returning to Berlin, she made the hard decision to end her marriage and committed to building a life with Lara. Now, Lara and Valeria share a home in Berlin, navigating a love that feels both hard-won and deeply cherished.

It hurt. It hurt a lot, but it was also empowering, because I knew it was the right thing to do.
- Valeria

Lin & Alexius

Lin wears sweater by Marine Serre & jeans by Dhruv Kapoor.
Alexius wears hat by A Cold Wall, hoodie by Stamm, jeans by Anni Salonen & boots by Rombaut.

Lin and Alexius' romance is the freshest of the five, but despite only reconnecting three months prior to our meeting, their story was seven years in the making. They first met in Lisbon, during a formative period of both their lives, through a shared circle of queer friends. Although they didn’t develop beyond friends-of-friends at the time, they had definitely noticed each other.

Now fast forward to July 2024, they had long lost touch - only to randomly reconnect on the dance-floor at a Christopher Street Day party in Berlin. From that moment, they spent the following days in a whirlwind together, finally returning to Lin’s apartment after countless hours dancing around the city.

One month later I had to go back to Slovenia to pick up a piece of furniture that I created for a client here, so I got a van, and I said, “Hey, do you want to come with me? It's a 12 hour drive. We can meet each other's parents, but it won't be like a vacation. We have to work.” And he's like, “Yeah, let's go”. We spent most the time in Slovenia, but we also visited Trieste, where his mum resides. - Lin

Sharing this trip together proved to be a catalyst for their romance. During the long drive, a simple card game sparked intimate conversations, allowing them to learn more about each other’s inner worlds, and meeting each other’s parents along the way highlighted the natural ease they found together. Through these moments, they came to fully appreciate the quiet, steady love that was unfolding between them.

I used to think love had to be passionate. Had to be like going insane, crazy, waiting on the end of the phone for a message. And that was my experience with love. My first boyfriend in New York was exactly like this. My first French boyfriend as well. There's this French word—’déchirant’— that means you’ve been cut open, like your insides are being torn apart. For me, that was love. With Lin, I started experiencing calmer love, and slowly, it was like this cut that I had in myself, was slowly healing. And right now I feel good about myself. I feel good about my life. I don't need that kind of love anymore. - Alexius

Kim & Bene

Berlin is a very quick city when it comes to love. Berlin is not a love city. Berlin does not keep your love safe. You have to do it on your own. Otherwise, the city will grab you—with dark energy sometimes. - Kim

Kim and Bene first crossed paths three years ago in Neukölln. At the time, Kim was in a relationship, and Bene was nursing a bruised heart from his own past. Their early conversations revealed a shared understanding, as both carried scars from toxic relationships. Whilst Bene described himself, at the time, as guarded but vulnerable, Kim became a calm and reassuring presence.

What followed was a natural and pressure-free progression. They spent time together as part of a close-knit friend group, sharing nights out in Berlin, becoming closer friends. Two years later, at a festival, their connection quietly evolved - and they shared their first kiss. Yet, even as they embarked on this new chapter, life brought its challenges - Kim still lived with her ex, with whom she shares a child. But, their relationship, grounded in patience and mutual respect, peacefully prevailed.

Everything fitted into place naturally. It always felt natural. It was not planned. And for sure, there were ups and downs - because it's also not easy to understand what you're feeling. Love means that you are verletzbar (vulnerable), and that you can get hurt. - Bene

Kim and Bene have built a love defined by calmness, trust, and the healing they’ve found in one another.

In the past I had mistaken my true feelings for being in love - and that quickly fades when you realise. You can confuse being in love with someone who is pushing the right buttons for you. The older I get the more I realise what love really means to me. It makes me feel calm. It’s not always just a rollercoaster. It feels like a mixture between butterflies and calmness. I had to realise that I was deeply, calmly in love with someone. Like the calm love I have with Bene. - Kim